Chappell Roan says having kids is hellish — and not all parents are upset about it.
“All of my friends who have kids are in hell,” the “Hot to Go!” singer shared on a March 26 episode of the podcast “Call Her Daddy.”
“I actually don’t know anyone who is like, happy and has children at this age,” said Roan, 27, adding, “I have literally not met anyone who is happy, anyone who has light in their eyes, anyone who has slept.”
“This is not looking too good,” responded Alex Cooper, the host of “Call Her Daddy.”
Many exhausted moms with flickering light in their eyes supported Roan.
- “Mothers are so tired! It’s true.”
- “YESSS. Finally someone speaking my language.”
- “49-year-mom of grown children. You are not wrong, girl. Being a mom in this country is … rough.”
- “I felt this in my soul.”
- “I love my child with my entire heart but everything she said was absolutely true for me.”
- “She is speaking the truth. Being a parent is hell.”
- “You have to understand: In the midwest, a lot of people get married and have kids out of obligation, not because they actually want kids. I know a lot of people like that and they’re miserable.”
Happy, well-rested and bright-eyed parents disagreed.
- “Having children = greatest honor of my life.”
- “Happy mother of three here!”
- “It’s so much more nuanced than ‘Motherhood is the best/worst.’ It is hard and she just showed that she’s not the person for her friends to vent to about the hard parts because she’s judging.”
- “It’s valid, but I personally don’t know anyone who lost their spark after having kids. All of them love it.”
- “As tired as I’ve ever been, nothing has filled my cup more than the snuggles, the giggles, and growth of my kiddos. Helping them become good and kind humans is the honor of my life and I’m a happy working mom.”
- “Completely tone deaf.”
Who is happier — parents or non-parents?
As Jennifer Glass, a sociology professor at the University of Texas at Austin, told CNBC, feeling “satisfied” with the decision to have children does not necessarily equal “happiness.”
“It’s not the same thing as financial well-being, good physical health or good emotional health,” Glass told CNBC.
Research shows parents experience a“happiness bump” right after a baby is born. But that tends to dissipate over the course of a year, Glass says — as it sets in that parenting is more than just cooing at a baby.
Glass noted in a 2017 study co-authored by Glass that parenting is harder in the U.S. compared to other countries, given our lack of parental leave and other benefits for moms and dads.
While the research was published nearly 10 years ago, it’s still true in 2025: Parents in the U.S. aren’t gauranteed paid parental leave and the cost of childcare is “untenable” for many, according to the United States Census Bureau.
Although Roan told “Call Her Daddy” that she and her “awesome” mom friends have “such different lives,” they still party — even if they have to hire babysitters.
“They’re mothers, they’re f—— busy and they have jobs and lives,” said Roan, joking, “When I go home, I love reminiscing about destroying public property with them and doing some illegal s—,” she joked.
